I hate birds. A lot. Well, only birds that do a certain thing to my car. Do you know what I'm talking about? If you own a car I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. Did you know that bird poop and rain have two things in common?
1) They fall from the sky
2) They get on your car right after you wash it
I want everyone to know (read as "I don't want anyone to know") that I always have bird poop on my car. Well, not 100% of the time but about 99%. During the second half of any given car wash my car is free of bird poop. Immediately after that, however, it has bird poop on it again. What drives me crazy is that the day after I wash my car, a bird poops on it, but then I'll go 2-3 weeks before washing it again, and during that time, no birds poop on my car(I hate saying "poop"). Why? Why, oh why does this happen? Can't they poop on my car the day before I wash my car?
Edit: This is literally the funniest thing ever. After writing a draft of this post, I walked out to my clean car, and there was bird poop on it. Oh the irony!
Written by individual contributor
Lane Fries (a.k.a. Dr. Freeze)
I wish I had an answer for this one for you, but I have come up empty!!!! It's just like it will definitely rain or snow the night that you wash your car, but that's not half as annoying as a bird pooping on it. That reminds me---today I paid $7 for a Car Wash---just the simple wash and rinse, because it knocks off $.10 a gallon when you also request a car wash. But when it was all over, I realized that no soap had been dispensed and it didn't give me a rinse either-----it was just 1 cycle of water spraying my SUV. But guess what, I was sooo tired that I just wanted to get home PLUS, I was SO AMUSED by the whole thing that I shrugged it off and drove home. Two things happened, will happen here: First, I've been so busy reading your blogs and getting things off my chest that irritate me too, thru commenting on your blog, that I felt rather "zen" about the whole thing, and just didn't care!!! Second, there will be someone else who goes thru that same car wash today that will be so angry and frustrated that they will park their semi-clean car, go to the gas station attendant and rant and rave and drive their blood pressure up thru the roof, and ruin their day and the day, not only of the attendant, but also of the 5 people in line behind him, that he will probably have to be rushed to the hospital for a possible stroke, So I may have wasted $7 on a car wash, but he will have several hundreds of $$$ in medical bills due raising his blood pressure over a $7 car wash wash!!! So I actually came out ahead of the game today! And don't worry about me "letting them get away with that kind of stuff---they need to learn to be more responsible" in their $7.50 an hour high-paying job. I'l cause a little bit of a stir the next time----I'm not good at being mean to people, but I thought for today, I'm just gonna let this one slide. Here's to my health!!!!!
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